Three Times The Love
Finding Answers and Hope for Our Triplets with AUTISM
By Lynn and Randy Gaston
Taking care of two children, one with a diagnosis of autism and the other without, is challenging. I have had to draw strength from my husband and my children just to get through a day. Before my son was diagnosed, I new he had autism. I saw a news report one day that said that the rate of divorce for couples with a special needs child was extremely high. It scared me. I didn’t think I could take it if my marriage couldn’t survive. Luckily, I have a wonderful and supportive husband. He always seems to know when I need a break or just to break down and cry. We never blame each other or our children for anything. At times though, it is difficult for us to not blame ourselves. I am his mother. I am supposed to protect him from everything. For the most part, I have accepted that this is one thing I had no control over.
What I can’t imagine is taking everything my family goes through and multiplying it by three. For Lynn and Randy Gaston, parents of Michael, Hunter, and Nicholas, triplets, that is exactly the case. Three boys who are all on different areas of the spectrum. Lynn and Randy have come out with a book about their lives and their children. I was very moved by this book. I could relate with fighting for a correct diagnosis, fighting with the schools, finding doctors who took your opinions seriously. They advocate so hard for their boys, just as my husband and I do with our son.
I would like to share two excerpts from their book with you. It is just one of many paragraphs that most parents of an ASD child can relate to.
“Hunter was so overstimulated that he paced the rooms like the Energizer bunny, never sitting down for more than a moment before beginning his new rounds; Nicholas kept trying to eat the beautiful red and white poinsettias arrayed throughout the house; the fact that they were poisonous made his attempts even more unnerving. Zachary became so overwhelmed that he broke down in one of the most massive tantrums we’d ever witnessed, wailing and crying. There was nothing we could do to calm him except to leave.”
“What was most memorable about the boys’ third birthday was that they didn’t realize it was their birthday. They knew they were receiving gifts and were happy with the cake and attention, but the significance of the day was lost on them.”
I remember Christmas’s like that. Only I had just one child that was having a meltdown, getting into everything, and yes we had to watch out for the poinsettias too. I can remember how frazzled I felt just keeping up with one little boy, I can’t even imagine multiplying that by three.
I remember the heartbreak I felt when my son didn’t have any interest in his birthday, his party, his presents, or anything else. People not showing up and saying that he wouldn’t even realize that they were not there. I would and I now know that yes, he did realize it.
Lynn and Randy include information about some therapies that they have used with their children. They let their readers know which have helped and which ones didn’t. They have also included some therapies that they have not tried but have researched. There is information about some of the laws that affect our children’s education, research results in areas that concern us all and a few other interesting bits and pieces.
I have to admit that my favorite parts of the book were the stories of their day to day lives. The highs and lows. The triumphs and disappointments. I cheered and cried, laughed and smiled. At the end, I was wanting more. I hope the Gastons put out a second book. If not, I’ll read this one again. It was that good.
I had the opportunity to talk with Lynn Gaston and ask her some questions. At this time, she doesn’t have any plans for another book. Writing this one, reliving the past, was “painful.” She told me that Zachary was doing great in school and that they think Hunter can read. I wouldn’t be surprised. My son had taught himself how to read long before we were smart enough to figure out he could. Lynn and I spent time sharing stories of our children. I really enjoyed the following story about Zachary(paraphrased for brevity sake):
“Zachary is becoming good with conversations. One day, he noticed that they were taking down the Citgo next to their house. We have to go by this gas station every day. He said “Oh no, my Citgo is missing.” The first time we drove by it after it was replaced with a BP, he said “Oh my, they fixed my Zachary Gaston gas station.” I was shocked so much, I almost crashed the car.”
If you have some time to sit down and read a good book, you will want to get this one. You can also enter to win a copy of this book. Two copies have been made available for a giveaway on my site. Yippee!!!
This Giveaway will run from March 22, 2009 to March 27, 2009. The winners will be announced on March 28, 2009. This giveaway is for USA only. Below are rules for entering this giveaway. Two winners will be chosen. One book per winner. Open to USA and International. Good luck.
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